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News: Smurfs Movie

‘The Smurfs Movie’, the first of a planned three, has been given the green light and is scheduled for release in November, just in time for a late Oscar push. You might think that this would bring tears to my eyes, but you’d be wrong. So wrong. On two counts actually: 1.) I am much to manly to cry, and 2.) finally this will answer the age old question: What would one like to do less than have a tiger paw at their genitals? Now we know, it is see this movie.


5 thoughts on “News: Smurfs Movie

  1. My gut reaction for Smurfette would be Charo because she’s blond and it’s in keeping with the very “theatrical” casting. But I’m not married to the idea.

  2. Sadly this is going to be computer animated, but I think we could talk them into doing it live action. I mean it’s not like it will lose any integrity by doing so.

    How about Danny Bonaduce as Handy Smurf? Or do you think the insurance required for that would cause the film to go too much over budget?

  3. It’s going to be CG because they haven’t thought about this thespian dream team. Let’s show them it’ll work. I hear “grounding it in reality” is all the rage in adaptations these days. So instead of the Smurf village with mushroom homes they could live in Harlem under drain pipes.

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