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This Week in Poorly Argued Criticism

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Man in line: Wait a minute, why can’t I give my opinion?  It’s a free country!
Alvy:  I mean, d- He can give you- Do you hafta give it so loud?  I mean, aren’t you ashamed to pontificate like that?

“Annie Hall” by Woody Allen & Marshall Brickman

Editor’s Note:  Supporters of the worldwide Internet community suggest that it is this one marketplace of ideas that makes the web something incredibly strong.  Unfortunately, the problem with everyone being able to give their opinion is that people often do.  ‘This Week in Poorly Argued Criticism’ is culled from a variety of on-line sources.  It’s goal is to not highlight bad reviews.  Instead, it is to point out that, no matter how highly praised or critically derided, there is a voice of dissent.  If the reader thinks, ‘physician, heal thyself,’ well, let this be a lesson for all.

The following quotes are presented as they were originally posted.  The spelling errors and syntax are their own.  While they may have been pulled from a larger review, they are as they appeared.  The views are not necessarily those of the Lonely Review staff.

The Polar Express
I loved the strong African American female lead in this one. She is so confident! Tom Hanks as the conductor has a bit of a mean streak that I didnt like, I was expecting “good cheer” at Christmas. I think the anxiety and disbelief comes out very well in the boy lead (also played by Tom Hanks I think). He has been lied to far too often and he no longer believes luckily for him in his world Santa is still real wheras in ours the original Saint Nick is long dead. The boy who “knows everything” was a bit annoying. It makes me sad to see people with knowledge portrayed as annoying.

Van Helsing
Can you say: AMAZING?!!!? This must be one of the best SFX movies ever made. It flat out rocks! Sure, some people say the plot is corny, the characters are corny, but, those who say that, I disagree with very, very strongly.

Wall Street
he few redeming qualities were another movie with Charlie and Martin Sheen working together and the “greed speech”. Too much full nudity and not enough plot to hold our interest.

Bed of Roses
This movie is for any woman who is feeling a little skeptical about love, and any man who needs a clue.

Reds
This is just an example of red hollywood propaganda. But it’s worth watching for the pathetic scenes between Keatton and Beatty shouting at each other and having sex afterwards. Brezhnev couldn’t have dreamt better for publicity during those years.

Hitch
This is one of my all-time favorite movies! They could have made it a bit shorter, but… oh well!

The Lookout
The Lookout is not great, it is not exceptional nor do I see why everyone is raving about it.

A Walk to Remember
this was an amazing movie. I really enjoyed it alot. I cried and cried many many happy things in this movie

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