Bale Owns

With the premeire of Batman only days away, Christian Bale was in New York and took time out of the day to sign autographs for everyone. Why is this news? I don’t know, maybe because celebs don’t always act in such a humane manner, or maybe because Bale is the shit and it’s my column …

Hollywood Hates You

How else do you explain why ‘Ace Ventura Jr.’ is being made? Because I can’t figure it out. Sure maybe I cheated on Hollywood with her much hotter sister. And maybe I stole her car to rob a bank. And yes I got drunk on several vacations with her family and threw up on her …

Bobby Digital Directing

Bobby Digital, AKA The Rzarector, AKA The RZA will be stepping into the directors chair to film a martial arts movie he has penned, ‘The Man with the Iron Fists.’ Are you nervous about a rapper turned director? Don’t be. The RZA has a talent for creating. He has worked with various directors on projects …

Hell Boy Pulls Gun on Lipton

Hell Boy loves to give interviews and look red while James Lipton pulls out 1992 slang. So here is another video for your non-reading behinds. And do you know why we don’t read? Because reading is for stupid people that want fingers to grow out of their eyes. Because that’s what happens when you read. …

Schwimmer and Co. Reunite?

I don’t want to say that I am the reason there is a ‘Friends’ movie being talked about, but it was only yesterday I pleaded with Hollywood and said that Schwimmer is the most bankable star they had and I’d be on board with anything he does, up to and including a Schwimmer themed waterpark. …

Bay Aces Character Development

‘Transformers’ was super saturated with 0 character development. Think about that for a moment. It had no character development. It made you think: how much less character development could there be in this movie? And the answer is none. None less development. Usually I would complain about this when reviewing a film, but then again …

Arrested Development Teasing (Come on!)

It feels a bit like an abusive relationship with a drunken monkey that continually beats you with its cane, but you stay around because when the monkey is not sloshed off its ass he can do a really cute juggling act and makes people noises.  (*Smooth transition*)  We constantly hear about Arrested Development the movie, …